While helping her out, she started telling me the story of how she was raped at the age of three until she turned thirteen. Now in her old age. My heart was filled with sadness as l continued to cry with her. Naturally, I can’t stand anyone crying and in pain like that of hers.

It was a memory of a bad situation that had happened to a then very young girl who was scared to tell her parents the horrible, terrible thing her uncle had been doing to her.

Dear, be mindful of leaving your daughter with any family member of yours. Be mindful of trusting any man, young or old with your daughters. Take care of your children yourself. May Allah always protect us and our children.

Umm Sumayyah Mai

I have come to realize the importance of preparing children with beautiful skills for them to become useful for themselves and the community at large. If you are a mother reading this, try to guide your children to engage in skills you think will be beneficial to them in the future.

My oldest daughter was 4 years old while her sister was 2 when l began to teach her how to make puff-puff with the colored rubber bands using her sister for practice. So, she started with her sister’s hair and now that she is a grown-up teenager, she knows it more than I do. She does her hair herself. The hair she usually makes for me will cost me $60 to make at the beauty salon.

Anything we do intentionally or unintentionally has its advantages. So, it’s important to always be creative and engage our children to be proactive as well. I am sure they will appreciate us when they grow up. May Allah protect her and her siblings. May He make our children the coolness of our eyes. I wanted to write this yesterday, but l couldn’t make it. I will also follow up with what I introduced to Dr. Sumayyah tomorrow,  ln shaa Allah! Perhaps, it will benefit you too. Barakhallahu Feekum!!!

Umm Sumayyah Mai

Dear Mothers,

The first time my first daughter made Jolof rice was on Eid day.  I was far away in Saudi Arabia answering the call of The Lord of the Majestic throne (Allah). And the second time was far better and splendid. I still cook for them, but they cook and know how to cook. You can’t be Majeedah’s daughter and be useless. No! I have promised to raise a better generation of children. This isn’t bragging – It’s a must. This is because l know l will be accountable for the trust that is put in my care.

I am pleading with all mothers to raise their sons and daughters pretty well. I do not want my son to marry a lazy, dirty, unorganized woman. This is why l haven’t left him alone to be dirty as well. I have always taught him what is cleanliness, leadership, and accountability. I have taught him how to clean, and make food for his siblings. I am still working on him. I wouldn’t stop. I told him a day would come when your wife would be at the hospital and you have to be home to cook for your children before the arrival of your new baby.

My definition of a productive Muslim isn’t just about being a Hafiz of the Q’uran. It also engulfs so many things including your character, mannerisms, cleanliness, and being responsible and accountable. Do not be tired of raising better children even if it has to come to sacrificing your sleep.  I am still working on my children and may Allah assist us in nurturing them well.

Umm Sumayyah Mai

Some of the things that happen in marriage would have been prevented if we put others in our shoes – If we can simply think of our siblings. Any man who plans to divorce a woman shortly after (nikkah) should put her sister in the same shoes. How would you feel if someone sent your sister parking because she has a small b o. b s? There should be other things such a sister will have that will make her unique in her way. Perhaps, such questioning should be included when making inquiries to avoid stories that touch. I am just thinking of how gross it may sound. Most sisters will be naturally shy when it comes to that.

While we advise our sisters to avoid being deceitful in their appearance, our believing men should also realize the fact that it may be hard for a woman to tell the world how weak the husband performs when it comes to intimacy. Many women tend to work with their husbands to find a lasting solution to such a problem. That’s just an example of what it means to be tolerant of some things. Well, it’s is called marriage. You may not be blamed for satisfying your wishes. Please, be mindful of Allah, and put your sister in the same shoes before making a decision.

In all sincerity, except if a woman is very bad, as in, very bad in deen and character, issues such as small b. u .t . t and small this and that can still be managed. Let’s always put the fear of Allah in all that we do. And especially in our marriages. Sorry, it’s just an opinion. It may not sound right to you! May Allah ease the affairs of our homes.

Umm Sumayyah Mai

Let me share with you how l deal with my challenges. Gone are the days when l allow anything to weigh me down. I have outgrown that a long time ago. I was able to do so because every Muslim should avoid being sad for Shaitain. Once you are sad, Shaitan will be happy and he will find all possible ways to enter you, negatively. This is because he knows you are vulnerable at that time.

So, l have learned to accept my challenges and beautifully deal with them. I know it will come, so l have always prepared myself to be steadfast and cry to my LORD whenever anything displeasing comes my way. I also have this strong mindset that Allah hasn’t left His throne, so, He will not leave me to myself – that everything will be fine at the end of the day. And l will eventually overcome it, ln shaa Allah.

While l continue to work towards resolving the issue in my little way, and with my frequent prayers; l still believe strongly in Allah – that, He will not forsake me. So, it has always been a positive outcome after all the trials and tribulations. You tie your camel first and ask Allah to keep a watch over it. We must always be ready to face our challenges. May Allah ease our affairs.

Umm Sumayyah Mai