Then, l will be naked along with many males and females; uncircumcised, barefoot, and waiting for my judgment. The result of what l did in Dunya. I will not be able to see if sister Maryam is not putting on underwear, nor will I have the time to check if Brother Lukman has covered his private part. I, along with many other people will be overwhelmed. Waiting, waiting, and waiting in fear and humiliation. 

I will be waiting under the scorching sun. And l will be sweating until my turn is reached and or perhaps until my name is called. I will not be able to look for my “Treasured Love.” Nor will l be asking for my children. I, alongside many other people, at that time, will perhaps be restless, tired, scared, and scattered. I will not remember my siblings nor will l look out for my parents. 

I will be more shocked, surprised, and scared when the contents of graves become scattered. And the sky breaks apart. And the stars fall, scattering. And the heaven split open. I will be more scared when my hands and feet begin to speak of what they used to earn. Of what l did with them while l was on the surface of the earth.

And l, alongside many other people (male & female), will be brought to account for every major and minor action we did in this world, whether it was good or bad. And we will be rewarded for our good deeds and perhaps be questioned about our bad deeds. I am scared and scared penning this down, right now. 

And when the “Lord of the Majestic throne say to the Angels, Look at My slave’s prayer, is it complete or lacking?’ If it is complete, it will be recorded as complete, but if it is lacking, He will say, ‘Look and see whether my slave did any voluntary (naafil) prayers.’ If he had done voluntary prayers, He would say, ‘Complete the obligatory prayers of My slave from his voluntary prayers.’ Then the rest of his deeds will be examined similarly.” 

And we would be asked about other matters. At this point, l do not know what l will be saying. And perhaps, the answers l will give when these five questions are asked: “My life and how l spent it, my youth and how l used it, my wealth and how acquired it, and how l disposed of it, and how l acted upon what l acquired of knowledge.

Oh Allah! Do not humiliate me on the day of judgment. Oh Allah! Do not put me to shame on the day of the greatest fear. Oh Allah! Conceal all my faults. Oh Allah erase all my sins. Oh Allah! Do not disgrace us. Oh Allah! Be merciful with us, overlook our shortcomings, and grant us steadfastness upon your Deen! Ya Rabbal ‘A’alaameen! 

 – Umm Sumayyah Mai 

#Repost

Life is full of ups and downs, and tests are inevitable. As humans, we’re imperfect – perfection belongs to Allah alone. When trials hit hard, remember to turn back to Allah, who has allowed you to go through them. 

In a recent discussion with some sisters online, I emphasized the importance of not comparing your marriage to others. Each of us faces unique trials, and what works for someone else may not work for you. Learn to navigate your own challenges and strive for the best. Having a supportive spouse is a blessing from Allah. 

Find comfort in patience and work on perseverance. Let prayer be your solace, and seek help when needed. If you’ve done your best and things don’t work out as planned, you will not be blamed for it, and your efforts will be rewarded by trusting in Allah. Make decisions calmly, and don’t forget to forgive yourself. May Allah ease the affairs of our homes.

– Umm Sumayyah Mai

A follow-up post: Following my previous post on unresolved issues. After your voice has been heard and necessary precautions and solutions to your plight have been rectified by reasonable and qualified people, it’s time for you to be patient and keep him in your prayers.

Remember that Shaytan can influence your home, so work on becoming the best version of yourself. Focus on areas he complained about, acknowledging that you’re not perfect either. 

Don’t expect changes to be perfect right away, but rest assured they’ll take effect In shaa ‘Allah. See him as a human who, like you, isn’t perfect, and continue praying. If changes aren’t made, gently bring it to his attention, and if necessary, report it again. As long as you’ve done your part beautifully, remember that relationships involve two people. May He rectify the affairs of our homes. 

– Umm Sumayyah Mai

Always avoid the blame game.

We need to learn to listen more, acknowledge our mistakes, and apologize. The other night, I questioned my husband about something I thought was wrong. However, he provided proof that clarified his intention, which differed from what I had understood. After seeing the proof, I was confused but chose to remain silent.

For a marriage to last, it’s essential to stop the blame game, compromise when necessary, and overlook our spouse’s shortcomings. May Allah ease the affairs of our homes.

– Umm Sumayyah Mai

Then, l will be naked along with many males and females; uncircumcised, barefoot, and waiting for my judgment. The result of what l did in Dunya. I will not be able to see if sister Maryam is not putting on underwear, nor will I have the time to check if Brother Lukman has covered his private part. I, along with many other people will be overwhelmed. Waiting, waiting, and waiting in fear and humiliation. 

I will be waiting under the scorching sun. And l will be sweating until my turn is reached and or perhaps until my name is called. I will not be able to look for my “Treasured Love.” Nor will l be asking for my children. I, alongside many other people, at that time, will perhaps be restless, tired, scared, and scattered. I will not remember my siblings nor will l look out for my parents. 

I will be more shocked, surprised, and scared when the contents of graves become scattered. And the sky breaks apart. And the stars fall, scattering. And the heaven split open. I will be more scared when my hands and feet begin to speak of what they used to earn. Of what l did with them while l was on the surface of the earth.

And l, alongside many other people (male & female), will be brought to account for every major and minor action we did in this world, whether it was good or bad. And we will be rewarded for our good deeds and perhaps be questioned about our bad deeds. I am scared and scared penning this down, right now. 

And when the “Lord of the Majestic throne say to the Angels, Look at My slave’s prayer, is it complete or lacking?’ If it is complete, it will be recorded as complete, but if it is lacking, He will say, ‘Look and see whether my slave did any voluntary (naafil) prayers.’ If he had done voluntary prayers, He would say, ‘Complete the obligatory prayers of My slave from his voluntary prayers.’ Then the rest of his deeds will be examined similarly.” 

And we would be asked about other matters. At this point, l do not know what l will be saying. And perhaps, the answers l will give when these five questions are asked: “My life and how l spent it, my youth and how l used it, my wealth and how acquired it, and how l disposed of it, and how l acted upon what l acquired of knowledge.

Oh Allah! Do not humiliate me on the day of judgment. Oh Allah! Do not put me to shame on the day of the greatest fear. Oh Allah! Conceal all my faults. Oh Allah erase all my sins. Oh Allah! Do not disgrace us. Oh Allah! Be merciful with us, overlook our shortcomings, and grant us steadfastness upon your Deen! Ya Rabbal ‘A’alaameen!

1.  – Umm Sumayyah Mai

#Repost

1. Allah has blessed us with Islam and the Sunnah, and we must show our gratitude through actions and words. One thing is to seek Allah’s aid and assistance, but when the prayers are answered, do we maintain that connection with our Lord? 

We all know ourselves and how lax we’ve become with our deen. We’ve forgotten how we used to be devoted to our daily prayers, night prayers, and remembrance of Allah. The affairs of this temporary world have taken over these beautiful practices.

Will you renew your contract with Allah today? Ensure that you’re always in connection with Allah, no matter what you do. Establish routines and be consistent. May Allah assist us all.

– Umm Sumayyah Mai

As a Muslimah, it’s essential to be someone who is respected and loved for her humility, kindness, and character. The little kindness you sacrifice and show to others means a lot; it speaks volumes about who you are and the identity you portray. Yes, people can be naughty sometimes, but your manner of dealing with them will earn you respect in front of everyone. Be someone known for helping others.

By Allah, I have two reasons for writing this post. It’s crucial to be different and, more importantly, to be someone people can vouch for even in your absence. You don’t only show kindness to your fellow Muslim but also to others, regardless of their religion or status. May Allah make us better.

– Umm Sumayyah Mai

Perhaps Allah knows he’s not good for you and is protecting you from future challenges. A failed marriage can lead to significant worries and depression for women.

He may have left you for a reason known only to him, and it’s possible he’s not the right fit. A man who complains about your religious practices or dress code is a red flag, indicating incompatibility in faith. If he leaves you for another woman, consider yourself blessed by Allah’s protection.

Let’s be clear: you can’t change a man’s level of religious commitment. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you can mold him to your standards. Recognize the red flags and accept Allah’s decree. Marriage is a serious commitment, not a trivial matter.

– Umm Sumayyah Mai

Marriage isn’t child’s play; as such, you must choose carefully and intelligently. As a Muslim, whether you are male or female, seeking a compatible partner involves considering many factors. By prioritizing compatibility, you need to identify your non-negotiables, such as your deen, mode of dressing, halal lifestyle, truthfulness, trustworthiness, integrity, and leadership. 

Before saying ‘I do,’ learn to know your priorities. Know what you’re looking for in a man or woman. You must look for a partner who shares the same Islamic values and principles as you: someone reliable, respectful, and supportive, with good character, morals, and manners. Someone who listens effectively, has good communication and conflict-resolution skills, good financial stability, emotional maturity, and accountability. Above all, someone with sound creed, piety, and humility.

I know you’ve been waiting for the right person to come your way. When the opportunity arises, take the advice and support of your family, friends, and community seriously. Seek guidance and Allah’s help through Istikhara. This isn’t the time to overlook checking a person’s background or associations. Be patient and don’t rush into a decision without making your findings, with the help of your parents and others. May Allah grant your heart’s desire.

– Umm Sumayyah Mai