It’s really laughable every time this topic comes up because I genuinely don’t understand it.
I had worked Thursday, Friday, and Saturday last week. On Sunday, I was finally home. I performed Fajr, did my routine adhkar, and went straight to bed. I had already set my alarm for 8:00 a.m. On a normal day, after three consecutive work shifts, the next day is usually my rest day—at least a full eight hours of sleep without interruption. Still, I set my alarm with the intention of preparing my husband’s food for work.
By Allah, I was extremely tired. The night before, I couldn’t even manage to do anything properly, not even to remind the children to prepare something for me. After Fajr, I was completely drained. But when the alarm went off, I got up. As soon as he woke up, I also got up. I asked him if he would like to take food with him to work that day. He said yes, so I sluggishly got up and prepared something for him.
My husband sometimes packages his food, or asks the kids to do it, and he wouldn’t want to wake me up, knowing the kind of work I do and how exhausting it can be. But at the same time, it is not fair to use that as a constant standard and assume it should always be that way. He is my husband, and he deserves to be served good food and treated well, regardless.
So, where some ladies are getting this idea from is unclear and honestly not understandable. How can someone enter marriage without understanding that they also have responsibilities? Were you only taught about the responsibilities of the husband and not your own? May Allah rectify us all.
Umm Sumayyah Mai
