Imagine sending Sumayyah to get you a cup of water, while she comes back with an empty cup. Well, you may simply say, she’s just a small little girl. How about you send her sister who is older than her. Perhaps, you will simply say, come here, I’m going to whip your butt today.
Imagine spending all your saved money to send your child to school, only for the child to come back with C’s. Imagine the worst thing someone had done to you; that you had said, l will never forgive you. Imagine, giving space to the one who had carried lotta tales about you. Imagine the one you called a best friend; who instead is a hypocrite by lying about you, behind your back.
Imagine that period when the one who was supposed to stand by you deserted you. Imagine the one whom you have thought you wanted to assist, only for him to say it to your face, and point blank, that you are an idiot. Just imagine and imagine those terrible, horrible moments at work, when someone stepped on your toes and allowed you to spill the salt.
The thought “indeed, Allaah is patient” comes to my mind, and l said to me, Majeedah, you are still lucky to be alive hale and hearty. I said to myself, you haven’t stopped sinning knowingly and unknowingly, yet, Allaah still covers your flaws. I said to myself, what have you been doing with your free time and how prepared and fearful are you towards meeting your Rabb?
I said to myself, “Allaah is indeed patient”. If not for His patience, this life would have come to an end by just one single crime, talkless of multiple crimes we have committed on the land. Allaah is patient but watchful. He never stops watching me and you. Yet, we are the people who forget, l and you. We are the people who are rooted in sins, l and you, we are the people who are ungrateful to Allah by not seeking repentance anytime we sin.
I can’t imagine being disobedient to You, Oh Allaah! l can’t imagine myself being very forgetful of my meeting with You, Allaah. I can’t imagine not paying full attention to Your warnings. I can’t imagine seeing and hearing from the right to the left, and from near and far, yet, not yielding to Your calls.
I can’t imagine myself being called to account for my sins, from the most concealed to the most apparent. I can’t imagine entering the fire of hell! I can’t imagine many things, yes, many things on the Day of the Greatest Fear!
Oh Allaah, please ease us our affairs and forgive us our sins, indeed your punishment is severe. Do please shower on us Your mercies. Ya Rabbal ‘Aalameen!
Umm Sumayyah Mai
February 5th, 2019